Supporting Selective Eaters

Article contributed by: Andrea Coffin, Maine SNAP-Ed Nutrition Educator

Selective eating can be one of the most challenging parts of raising kids. What’s often labeled as “picky eating” can stem from a variety of reasons: sensitivity to smell or texture, anxiety about new experiences, and even genetically influenced preferences. Even kids who have previously been adventurous eaters can suddenly shift and become surprisingly resistant. 

Sharing food with family and friends is meant to be a source of joy, but can quickly become a source of stress when caregivers feel frustrated or concerned about nutrition and children feel pressure at mealtimes. The tension can erode the pleasure and family connection that can come from sharing food. 

If you are caring for a selective or resistant eater, here are some ideas for bringing more ease and openness to your mealtimes. 

Repeated exposure works.

It can take 10-15 times before a child accepts a novel food. Introduce new foods in small portions, prepared in different ways. 

Encourage exploration, not just eating.

Offer opportunities to explore food, even if that means only looking at or smelling a new food as familiarity builds comfort over time. 

Offer choice.

Avoid forcing a child to take bites. Allow them to say, “No, thank you,” as you continue to offer them new foods. This approach creates an atmosphere of trust and safety and gives children that sense of control they need. 

Support true hunger.

Make sure kids come to meals hungry. Avoid filling up on juice, milk, or snacks just before dinner. Offer whole fruits earlier in the day to support steady energy and balanced blood sugar with fiber, vitamins, and minerals.  

Model healthy eating and let other kids lead.

Children learn through social modeling. If they see a caregiver, a cousin, or a friend try a new food and enjoy it, they may feel more willing to try it themselves. Caregivers can model their own curiosity and enthusiasm for a new food. “I wonder how it will taste…”

In the end, helping a selective eater is not about fixing them, but about creating an environment where they feel safe and curious, and where pressure is released and trust is built. Celebrate small steps and keep encouraging. 

If your child’s selective eating seems extreme and shows signs of malnutrition or struggles to gain weight, please seek the help of a qualified medical practitioner for support.

Healthy Acadia’s Maine SNAP-Ed Nutrition Educators offer year-round cooking and nutrition classes in partnership with schools and organizations throughout Hancock and Washington counties. To learn more or schedule a class, contact Shannon (shannon.cherry@healthyacadia.org) or Andrea (andrea.coffin@healthyacadia.org) in Washington County, or Amy (amy.russell@healthyacadia.org) or Christine (christine.dentremont@healthyacadia.org) in Hancock County.